Reviews - SpoilSins

The Emperor's New Groove (2000) review, scored 8.1 out of 10

The Emperor's New Groove (2000): Llama Drama Trauma

Disney accidentally made their best comedy by completely abandoning everything that makes a Disney movie. You know that animated emperor-to-llama pipeline you never knew you needed? It exists, and it slaps...

Michael (2026) review, scored 8.9 out of 10

Michael (2026): Angel Gets His Wings Clipped

You want angels? Hollywood gives you John Travolta chain-smoking, eating sugar straight from the bowl, and smelling like cookies. I'm not making this up. This 1996 fever dream asks what happens when heaven...

The Creator (2023) review, scored 7.6 out of 10

The Creator (2023): Blade Runner Meets Vietnam

You've seen this movie before, just never looking this gorgeous. Gareth Edwards drops $80 million on screen like it's $200 million, crafting the most visually stunning sci-fi film in years while borrowing its...

少林足球 (2001) review, scored 7.8 out of 10

少林足球 (2001): Kung Fu Kicks Goals

You've never truly lived until you've watched a bald monk bicycle-kick a soccer ball so hard it literally catches fire. Stephen Chow took two things that have absolutely no business together and created...

John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017) review, scored 7.9 out of 10

John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017): Puppy Revenge Goes Global

You thought the first film was just a revenge fantasy about a dead puppy. Cute. Keanu Reeves returns with a body count so astronomical it makes the original look like a warm-up stretch. The Continental's rules...

The Da Vinci Code (2006) review, scored 7.4 out of 10

The Da Vinci Code (2006): Jesus Has Grandkids Now

You know that feeling when you watch a perfectly competent film and somehow leave feeling absolutely nothing? Ron Howard assembled an A-list cast, a bestselling phenomenon, and managed to create the cinematic...

Kong: Skull Island (2017) review, scored 7.2 out of 10

Kong: Skull Island (2017): Ape Geography Gone Wrong

You want a monster movie that actually respects your intelligence? Too bad, this one respects your eyeballs instead, delivering Vietnam-era helicopter carnage and a 100-foot ape who treats Samuel L. Jackson...

Role Models (2008) review, scored 7.2 out of 10

Role Models (2008): Guidance by Goofballs

Sure, youve seen comedies with misfits learning life lessons. But heres the thing: just when predictability lurks, our dynamic duo flips the script. Stay with me on this, because theres more than just...

Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012) review, scored 7.1 out of 10

Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012): Frosty Shenanigans!

Hold onto your acorns, Scrat still hasnt learned his lesson, his obsessive acorn chase unleashes apocalyptic chaos, again! Meanwhile, Sid, the sloth nobody asked to be a life-coach, guides us through...

The Iron Giant (1999) review, scored 8.4 out of 10

The Iron Giant (1999): Titanium Tantrums

Strap into your retro rockets as we blast into the heart of Cold War paranoia, with a little boy who befriends what may or may not be a Soviet weapon of mass destruction. Dodging shady government agents and...

The Goonies (1985) review, scored 8 out of 10

The Goonies (1985): Treasure Shenanigans

The movies subtle charm lies in Mikeys gap-toothed grin, mouthy Chunks unexpected heroism, and Datas hilariously ineffective gadgets. Its a gloriously rambling ride where every absurdity is digested with...

The Fast and the Furious (2001) review, scored 7.6 out of 10

The Fast and the Furious (2001): Vroompocalypse

The charming allure of this flick lies less in its plot and more in the deafening roars of engines, the blur of hypnotically spinning wheel rims, and the existential debates about what constitutes a quarter...